You’re in a relationship that is Fake. Yes, you and your partner have been playing a role for a very long time. This relationship began sweet and sassy. You guys started off this 20 year relationship in faith, trust and love. Your relationship has grown apart over time because of the pressure of society on your relationship to be perfect. Or actually what you guys have place on yourself as an expectation of the relationship.
Let me remind you that the first few years were awesome!
Then it was reality hit. You couldn’t have a baby and the pressure of this crippled your relationship. For both of you sexual intimacy became a thing of the past and the business of having a baby was the thing of the future. This lasted for about 4 years and you guys just became friends with a purpose of you having a child and him being successful at work. Time passed by quickly and partying, hangin out, working, traveling was you guys intimate connection. The friendship grew but the sexual romance slowly dwindled.
There was a goal, a purpose to make money to be successful and to build your foundation. This was cool for awhile then the first child came then the second child came and time drifted your love apart. The relationship business was growing but the passion for each other became stale. You wanted more and your partner wanted more but no one said anything. Traveling became more and more frequent for your partner and you found peace with this. Everything was shoved under the carpet while the years passed by. The light went on then the show started. When the light went out you knew in your heart something was wrong with this picture. The picture was not happy. There was no fulfillment. The love was lost somewhere in the dark. You felt like you were traveling blindly with no support.
Where is the real love?
Now, you’re a Relationship Coach teaching people about building the best relationship within themselves, with their family or partner. You ask them to answer the hard questions to themselves. You’re successful at what you do. You ask people to ask themselves, Who am I? What do I want? Where do I go from here? How do I get there?
As a coach, you help people to pull the best out of themselves; however, you never did that within yourself until recently and the naked truth came out. That truth was scary. It was difficult to handle but it was your truth. You didn’t worry about what people thought or felt. It was about you and your partner – the true feelings. We love but are not in love.
There was no trust, no faith, no teamwork and no commitment to the future.
You were working so hard on building the relationship but it takes two! There are two faces in the relationship and one was not happy. It showed! It showed it’s ugly face in the dark behind closed doors. The ugliness of the relationship came out. Which was a lack of love and trust.
So here you are today, looking at your computer, writing your book and you sit here crying wondering where did the time go?, where did the love go? and who are you today? A mom, a wife, a sister, a daughter, a friend, a writer, an entertainer and much more. How do you regain confidence? How do you build yourself up because you have been pulled down for so long. How do you regain your power? How do you find the person you once was? How do you become whole again?
Hmmmm… So I ask you the hard question are you in a Fake Relationship? How can you make this relationship REAL and Live Life 4 Real in your relationship?
But… It takes two… Not just you! Both parties must come to the realization that being Fake is not OK anymore. It will not work.
My advice to myself is to find out Who I am in this Relationship outside of the glitz and glam and What do I really want? and How do we get there? The future is not your to control. Have faith that it will all work out. Whether together or apart.
The good news is… that you guys are in a good place you can now reflect on what needs to happen to move forward in this Real Relationship in Truth and Love.