Yes, a relationship is a work in progress and Yes, we have our expectations of our partner. However, there are some expectations that can be considered unrealistic. Here are some unrealistic expectations that women have of men.
1. Be My Manservant:
Translated: Someone who caters to your every need. “He treats me like a queen” in other words: Mr. Sauve
The Thought: Pamper me, put rose pedals in my bath water, always open my door, OOOOOH…because….. you know how to cook…make dinner for us when you get home from work, make sure you want me when I want you (smile). Be my arm candy at events and work functions.
The Reality: Most men want to cater to you in some form or fashion, but sometimes the high expectations may cause them run away or be tired or feel like they are being taken advantage of. “Who does she think I am?” “I am tired of being her manservant.”
The Real Expectation: Is being with a man who is thoughtful and considerate of your needs and feelings. Express to him the things that you like when you guys first meet or share with your guy the things that makes you happy. This is always a two-way street. Yes, you should be treated and feel like a queen however, every queen needs a king not a royal subject. (smile)
2. Be Mr. R$ch$e R$ch
A man who has it all (money).. Plus, he has all of the S’s….smart, successful, smooth, simple, sexy, spontaneous, sporty, special, spectacular, suspenseful, seductive, sensitive, supportive, straight, side-splitter (makes you laugh) and single.
Translated: The man of your dreams with the money to back it up. He is a Doctor, Lawyer, Entrepreneur, CEO, Professor at a University, a successful athlete etc.
The Thought: I want him to sweep me off my feet with luxurious gifts, trips and dinners. He has the 3 B´s, a BIG house, BIG car and a BiG shhhh! He must be able to buy me a big ring, support me and take care of everything. Oh, he is the one paying for all the dates, all the time!
The Reality: There is a small percentage of men that fit this category and if he fits all of these categories you would be super JEALOUS person (smile) because every woman and man want him! Laughing!!! Really, this guy is a figure of our imagination or taken!!! Or if he is single and 40 he has some serious issues about his swag and has the pick of the litter. Therefore the question then becomes, what do you have to offer?
The Real Expectation: Being with a man, who is a great provider, someone who works hard has a great job that supports you and the family. He is excited about his role in your relationship and showers you with love, respect, an acknowledge. He showers you with things that he can provide you with based on his means. He is not “show boating” he is authentic in nature. He loves you for who you are and you love him for who he is. He is passionate and a go getter! A go getter will pay the bills!!!! Don’t forget if you make more money, you can always support him in his endeavors and even get him looking sharp when you guys go out (smile) as long as you are cool with it!
3. Be My Knight in Shinning Armor
An idealized or chivalrous man who comes to the rescue of a woman in a difficult situation. A man who helps out a woman when she is in distress!
Translated: A man who fights for you. He defends you. He would kick someone’s butt if they stare at you too hard! In one word: The Protector!
The Thought: I want him to fight for me, if someone says something wrong to me or when I am in a disagreement I want him to have my back, even if I am loosing. If I leave, you should rescue me because I know, that you know, that I am your true love.
The Realty: Most men want to fight for you, but in perspective. They need to see that it came from them not because you want them to fight but because they are compelled to fight for you! They may even ask themselves “Is she worth me fighting for her?”
The Real Expectation: Being with a guy that takes up for you because you guys are a team and he wants you to be respected by others. He sees and feels that you are the person he wants to protect and be with.
4. Be My Work in Progress
A man who is in transition, someone who can be transformed into the ideal mate with instruction and education.
Translated: A man who is willing to change into what you want him to be. In one word: Puppet
The Thought: He is a person that I can change and create into the man who I want him to be. He will change just with a little manipulation. He will stop cheating. He will stop being weak. He will be more caring. He will get his college degree. He will start to save money if I teach him. He will…..
The Realty: Men do not want to be changed! You can’t change someone’s core! They are who they are such as cheater will most likely cheat again, a controller will always control, a dirty person will tend to be dirty, and a weak person will just be weak! You can help someone dress better or educate them but their core personality will not change. The real reality is, there are men that do change, but not because you want them to!!
The Real Expectation: Is being with a guy that has the similar core values as yourself. If he values family, being a hard worker, loving life etc. Understand what your core values are and then you can understand if his align with yours.
5. Be My Savior
A man who saves from danger or takes you out of your misery.
Translated: A man that is rescuing you from something that you feel is weighing you down.He is the baby maker, provider, care giver, or the lover (physical). He is the guy that will help you financially, physically and emotionally. For Example: I am broke with 3 kids and I need a man to help me to pay my bills. I am getting older and I need a man because I do not want to be single for the rest of my life!
The Thought: He is a person that will attend to my missing needs.
The Realty: Men will get tired of the savior role quickly because there is no love. The intentions are not pure. The intention is to fill a void or need. You may not truly love this person, you are using him for your own objectives! He may be also using you to feel like a MAN and a SAVIOR because you need him.
The Real Expectation: Is being with a guy that loves to do things for you but does not need to fill a void. The void will be filled with love and compassion from the other person.